The decision to end the marriage is one of the most difficult decisions that an individual has to make. Depending on the situation, it is best for some marriages to end due to their unsafe nature, while at other times, marriage and relationships should be repaired.
It’s only you who understands and knows your situation and can decide the best for yourself and the family. So if you are struggling with this unsure and overwhelming situation of “is divorce your right option“, then we are here to help. This article will give you answers to your questions and help you make a good decision.
Can marriages be saved?
People considering divorce always think that they have only two options. Should I take divorce and find my happiness? Or should I stay in the marriage to keep the family together and stay unhappy? But what they don’t know is that most of the time, these are not the only two options they have.
If you are in an unhappy marriage and both the spouses work together, then the marriage cannot only be saved but can also become happy and healthy again. Research has found that the majority of unhappy marriages, if not ending in divorce, can become happy with the passage of time.
Usually, the problems are not in the marriage itself but from the outside, such as loss of job or death of a loved one. These can put stress on the relationship, but with time this can improve.
How to strengthen my marriage?
If you are looking to make your marriage work, then there are various ways in which you can repair your marriage. You can try counseling. When both spouses go for marriage counseling, then they are able to resolve their problems and save their marriage.
Some people don’t like counseling; they might be reserved and may want to resolve the problems on their own. Then there are many self-help books available that you can use. In addition to counseling, there are classes offered for marriage strengthening. So you can try these, where the spouses talk and communicate with each other and are able to solve their problems and save their marriage.
What are the signs that you might be able to make your marriage work?
You may be able to make your marriage work if the following is true:
- Both of you want to save the marriage.
- At least one of the spouses is willing to work to save the marriage by taking counseling or classes or reading self-help books.
- You both are willing to communicate and talk things out to solve the problems instead of blaming one another.
- Both of you understand that disagreements and problems are a part of marriages.
- The spouse at fault is willing to apologize and take responsibility for the problems they might have created.
- Both of you are willing to put in effort and time to resolve issues and save marriage.
What are the signs that divorce is a better option for you?
Sometimes divorce is the only option you have left.
- You think that the marriage is not worth saving.
- You both do not want to change and be compatible with the new situation.
- You both are not ready to forgive and make up with each other.
- You both are not willing to communicate and talk things out to solve the issue.
- There are repeated cases of abuse, infidelity, and drug addiction.
- Both of you see yourself as innocent while blaming the other spouse for being guilty.
Abuse, infidelity, and drug addiction clear signs for divorce?
These three situations are very serious and can make your marriage crumble.
1) Abuse
Abuse in a marriage can be devastating, as it not only affects the other spouse but it also affects the children and the family. Ending the marriage is better for the children as well as the abused spouse. In other cases, getting a divorce from an abusive spouse can prove to be unsafe. This is why it is better to work with a domestic violence shelter or get in touch with a Pasadena Family law firm to end your marriage easily and safely.
2) Infidelity
Finding out that your spouse has cheated on you can be devastating and heartbreaking. However, the majority of the spouses who face this problem are willing to stay together and work out their marriage. There are various programs offered that help you heal, cope and move on. Other than that, you can also get help from a marriage counselor who will help you heal and make a wise decision regarding your marriage.
3) Addiction
There are many forms that addiction can take, such as drug, pornography, or gambling addiction. If one of the spouses has any one of these addictions, then your marriage can face the test of times. There are various organizations and counselors who help with drug abuse. In most cases, addicts can get better and save the marriage. But in other cases, ending the marriage and separating from the spouse is better for you and your children. Since every marriage is different so every situation will be different, this is why what you decide will be unique.
What about separation before divorce?
Before ending your marriage, you can try taking time out by separating from your spouse. If you are struggling with making a decision and feel overwhelmed and confused, then you can take space and get your thoughts together first. This separation can open up new ways for you to protect your relationship and save your marriage.
If you are thinking about separation, then that too requires legal consultation because if you leave your spouse without a legal letter, then that can be used against you, and it is considered deserting. It could also affect the alimony you get at divorce, and the custody of children may not be given to a deserter.
Legal separation is a split between the spouses. Splitting of property and shared debts and assets are all considered in this scenario. A parenting plan is also devised. It is quite similar to divorce, but it is a less permanent way of splitting up.
In conclusion
There are many reasons that lead to a divorce, such as abuse, infidelity, addictions, financial problems, different styles of parenting, and much more. Sometimes you want to reconcile while your spouse doesn’t. In every case, the possibility of getting a divorce may help you both reconsider many things and may even work things out. But if by reading this article you feel like divorce is a better option for you, then it is important that you consult with a lawyer who has your best interests in mind.